Thursday, October 6, 2011

consistent parenting

yesterday was one of those days. the kind where carter tested my patience to the N'th degree, and i could clearly see my mother-of-the-year award, slipping further and futher out of my reach. he screamed all through safeway, refused to obey almost everything asked of him, and later in the day cried about EVERYTHING! he was in and out of time-out all day, had a spanking or two, and even more threats hissed at him through clenched teeth.

as i went to bed last night, after i had expressed my frustrations to tyrell, i lied there wondering why i can't be a better mother? i lose my temper, i raise my voice, and sometimes...on the worst days, i consider my child's imminent demise :) i mean, where is the loving, calm, and wise, mother who will be praised by her adult children as a great teacher and disciple of Christ from the pulpit of the conference center? :)

it is at these low points, where one needs a little support and validation that not everything you do as a parent is in need of revision. and who better to buoy you up in your time of need, than the man who loves you no matter what. so in an attempt to fish out a compliment, i posed a question to tyrell:

"does it make you so sad that i am not a great mother?"

to which he so lovingly replied:

"no. it just makes me feel better about not being a great dad."

well folks, there you have it... at least here in the smith home we are all on the same page, providing consistently bad parenting :)

6 comments:

Stephanie Clites said...

its the age he is! I've been hearing so many mom's of boys that age saying how awful their child has been. Which means, that's what I'm about to deal with :( Just stick with disciplining him and he'll learn you're in charge, not him. Good luck!

Clint and Tiffany said...

That's too funny!! I just read a book called "Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours" by Kevin Leman and it has really recharged my mom batteries. It's definitely worth the read.

Yeah, trying to muscle a compliment out of these boys pretty much ends up in sarcasm... must be something in the water they drank growing up. Oh crap, my kids are drinking the same water!!! LOL At least he roped himself in with you instead of trying to leave you in the dust, ya know? :O)

The Sheffield's said...

i find myself having these same type of days lately. in fact today was one of those days and i am so glad that i checked you blog because i needed to know that i wasn't the only mother letting the mother-of-the-year award slip away.

thanks for being honest about parenting and making me feel better about myself. i wasn't wise enough to try and get a compliment from sterling.

Andy and Michele said...

I laughed so hard! Oh Tyrell!! You are an awesome mom. Just like Steph said, it's the age. Briggs has been especially naughty these past few days & I go to bed praying that I'll be given another chance tomorrow (that our house won't catch fire or whatever) to be a good mom to him & not yell & lose my temper, etc.

BUT, I have noticed that he just wants attention & with everything thats going on here, he's not getting much. So . . .he acts out cuz then at least mom notices him, even if it is as she's dragging him to timeout.

My plan - sit down & read him a story first thing in the morning right after breakfast b4 I start on all my other stuff. Give him + attention 1st so he won't feel obligated to dig for the negative. I'll let you know how it goes!

I read the same book as Tiff, & it's a good one. Also, the baby whisperer for toddlers.

Erin-lou said...

Jordan you are so funny! I too have those same thoughts. I think we have days like those so we really appreciate the good days.

Lucia said...

I laughed so hard at Tyrell's comment!! That's exactly how my husband would respond and the funniest part is that they are trying so hard to say the right thing!!

You have such a cute family!! And you look great!

PS You're a great writer... and I'm not brown nosing, i thought of all these things as I was checking out your blog so I thought I would just say it:)